not scared of suck-cess

Two days! Twooooo days I've made it without a smoke, and I'm not frustrated or irritable. I've just had it with smoking.

Holy shit.

It's amazing. I have felt SO jubilant for the past two days, too! It's unreal.

I must say, cold turkey has been impossible for me this month - the times I've tried up until this point - but I think the most important decision I made was to not be angry with myself for relapsing. The first time I failed I bought a pack, then another, and another. The second time I just bummed a few. This time, I don't want to have to quit again!

Word choice is so important too. Today I had to stop myself from saying to a few friends, "I'm trying to quit again and I'm doing well so far!" because that sentence has a zillion gaps in it. ALTHOUGH when I said, "I've quit. I'm a nonsmoker," and then I say, "It's been two days," many of my smoker friends chuckled, Yeah right. Funny how some don't take me seriously, and how I use their lack of faith as a boost for my ambition.


I'm interested in what non-smoking life is like. Jeez! I truly think that as a nonsmoker I will be generally less stressed out and more.. attentive to my surroundings.

Participating in the world without messing with cigarettes is like being in the world for the first time again.

I don't want to think about the old routine, because I'm shedding it. If I don't want to be a smoker when I'm 30, I might as well not be a smoker as I approach 24.

I'm looking forward to all the new smells I'll get, as my li'l self is cleansed.. feels like I'm a cat at a window screen in early spring, sniffing. =^.^=

Meow indeed! Happy cat am I!

I feel like I just punched the sun!